Change

I have just spent my first official month as a stay at home mom. I don't really count my maternity leave since I was preparing to return to work those three months. I have to say that so far this has been a most incredible experience.

I love being with my kiddos more. We are having the most fabulous time together. Ryleigh and I spend every afternoon cooking, crafting or learning to clean. I need lessons as much as she does. Avery and I are so in sync, it's amazing. I understand the meaning of her every whimper. This was by far the best decision I have ever made for myself. I've always known that this woudl be best for my family, but never did I imagine that I would benefit, that my soul would benefit so much from making this life change. I love being able to cook every night, to get dinner on the table by the time my husband gets home gives me a huge amount of pride. We now spend our weekends spending quality time together as a family, not just prepping for another week. I can't wait for the summer, we've got swim lessons, VBS, gymnastics, library time and whole bunch more planned to keep us busy.

I spent so many years of my life trying so hard to be so different than my mom. I wanted to be the exact opposite of everything that she was...my career was going to be far more of an accomplishment than the years that she spent staying home with us kids. However, here recently, I find myself comparing myself to her more and more. I don't know how she did it, how she was such a wonderful mom and wife and cook and housekeeper all those years, but I'm determined to figure it out and I'm determined to have my kids look back and be as appreciative of me some day as I am of her. I just know not expect that until well after their teenage years...:)